I apologize upfront if this post is sporadic, long, boring, lame, hard to follow, stupid, grammatically incorrect, etc., etc., etc. I have a lot on my mind right now and nothing to do at work. And I'm not really in the mood to go beg for more work since I know there isn't any for them to give me. So I'm just going to sit in my office on this cold, blustery winter - oops I mean spring - day, freezing, blogging, and wishing I were lying on the beach with a good book and drink in hand.
But now that I've sat down to write this post, my mind has gone blank. OK - that's a lie. I still have a lot on my mind, but it's all so random and unconnected that I'm having a hard time putting anything down...I was going to say "on paper", but that's not right...I guess I could say "on screen"? But that just sounds lame. So I'm just going to leave it up to you to decide what I'm putting my thoughts down on. (wow - if this paragraph is an indication of this to come in the post I really am sorry)
The number one thing on my mind is something I've been trying to get off my mind for...oh...3 weeks now. Why is that when you really want to stop thinking about someone, they are all you can think of? Why, after 3 weeks does my heart still skip a beat whenever I get a text in hopes that it's from him even though it's been over a week since we've talked? Why can I not stop myself from checking if he's online on facebook whenever I'm on? Why do I even care so much? Why can't I just get over him? And most importantly - why the heck won't he ask me out again? Why can't he see that I'm a good catch? (which - according to Jo's mom - I am btw) I feel like I'm a stupid girl with her first crush...shouldn't things be different now that I'm (gulp) 26?
Next thing on my mind are my feet. They hurt. I ran 2.25 miles yesterday in preparation for a 5k I'm doing in about 2 weeks and I came away with two LARGE blisters. They are on the beginning of my arches - right behind the pad of my feet. They hurt! Every step I take is a painful. It didn't really help that two hours after running those 2.25 miles, I put back on my shoes for an hour of hip-hop. I don't know how I'm going to be able to run today as planned. In fact I might need to take a break today and do pilates. I need new shoes. And good ones. As in - go to a special store and have someone help me pick out the perfect pair for my feet because I feel like most running shoes hurt. But I don't really have the money for that right now because...
Thought three: money. My camera broke this weekend. I don't know what happened to it. I didn't drop it. It was working great until...suddenly...nothing. I turn it on and the lens went out then in then out then in then out and the screen went blue. I've tried it a few times since and same thing. So...needless to say I need a new camera. (I'm thinking of this one) I'm also trying to pay off my car before I move into a new apartment so I'll only have one large thing I need to worry about paying each month. But I don't know if I'm going to be able to make the goal. Why? My work has asked me if I would be willing to go on a 4-day work week since we're so slow. I don't know for sure when that will be happening, but I have a feeling it'll be soon. Actually - I won't be working tomorrow since both the partner and the manager are taking the day off so no one will be around to push work my way. And like I said earlier - I don't have anything to do now. So it might be starting this week...we'll see when the partner gets back in town and we can sit down and chat. So to sum up thought three: I have some big-ticket items that I need to buy/pay off, and my pay check is only getting smaller. Humph...
Thought four: a little friend. I've been thinking I want a dog. A small one that will curl up on my lap while I watch TV or read a book. Not a big one that will bowl me over when it jumps on me and slobber all over my clothes - gross! I really want a beagle. They are just so dang cute! Jo says her only stipulation is that it's not a yappy one. Are beagles yappy? OK - I obviously have some research to do. Jordan - I need your help. But I can totally picture myself taking the dog for walks in the park on a nice spring/summer/fall day (I kind of dread having to take it for walks in the middle of winter - but I'll do it). I could take my little dog with me to the cabin when the family goes and then Cooper could have a friend to play with. They would be good buddies. But am I ready for that long-term commitment? And I don't want the dog to live its life in an apartment with no yard to run in. So does that mean I should look for a house?
Which brings me to thought five: I've been considering buying a house/condo instead of renting an apartment. I would still live with Jo (obviously) but I would own the home/condo and she would rent from me. But would this cause friction in our perfect relationship? And would we get a third roommate? Who? And what if I decide that I don't want to live in UT any longer - then I'd have to go through the hassle of selling the house and in this crappy market that's not a sure thing. And then I'm brought back to thought three - do I really want to tie myself down with a mortgage payment? And I don't have the capital to put down a lot of money. Plus then I have to consider the whole furnishing the house/condo and decorating it - but let's be honest...that's the fun part. Expensive, but fun. The thought is still tempting and I'm not putting it on the shelf just yet.
Number six - my health. No I don't have any health problems that I'm concerned about. I'm just talking in the general way. I'm trying to be healthier. Trying to eat better - which is difficult since my work goes out to eat every day at places like Cafe Rio, Pier 49, Noodles, Bajio, Five Guys, etc. (side note - I wish they had the nutrition information for these places so I could see what I'm really eating - they do in NY and I miss it) I work with guys so they never want to go to Kneaders, or Zupas, or Paradise - ya know...places with soups, salads, and sandwiches that are a little healthier. These places are too girly for these guys (I'm not kidding you - that's why they won't go) And I could go on my own - which I do sometimes. But it's more fun with people. Plus I like the guys I work with - they make me laugh. So to make up for the less-than-healthy lunches, I've been trying to go to the gym more and I've started going to zumba. It's a blast and a great workout! Which brings me back to point two and needing new shoes.
Now I'm thinking about this strange stomach pain I'm having right now. It really hurts. I don't like this at all. I hope it goes away soon. I've never been pregnant so therefore I've never had contractions...but I feel like they would be similar to what I'm going through right now. Ow! Please stop stomach.
Ugh - now I need to think about Form 990. I've never done one of these returns and really am not up for learning new things today. I like spending the day blogging and facebooking and playing scrabble with Sara (thank you iPhone). Oooo - but I actually did some allocations in excel today which was fun (yes I did say "fun"). It probably wasn't absolutely necessary - it was just a transfer of interest from one partnership to another...OK no one cares Kristy...anyway, I decided to to the allocations anyway because I've decided that I really like to work in excel and wish that I could do more of it at work. That's one of the few things I miss about PwC - figuring out complicated partner allocations - 704(c) basis, side pockets...OK I officially sound like the nerd I am. Back to 990's - I don't want to do it!!! I've been given a 3" binder full of 990 instructions that I get to read so I know what I'm doing when it comes to preparing the return. Oh - and I've been playing around so much today that I now have 2 990's to do! Whoopee (please not the sarcastic tone)! I think the 4-day work week will be great. I don't have much more motivation than that anyway. Lately, my motivation has only lasted 2 maybe 3 days.
OK - thought number 9 (I'll stop at 10 I promise). My next big vacation. I've been thinking about Africa. More specifically an African safari in Tanzania. AMAZING right? Problem is - I don't have the vacation time to do that, and again, back to thought 3 - money issues. Ugh - why can't I just find some older, wealthy man who wants to spend all his hard-earned cash on me?!?!? Or maybe even a trust fund baby. I'm totally ok with being a trophy wife - in fact I'd kind of prefer it. Which brings me back to thought six - if I want to make that dream come true I better get my butt in shape so that I'd be worthy of the trophy wife title. And a trophy wife ALWAYS has a little dog...so I'll keep working on thought 4. Oh - but this thought was about Africa. Back to that. I really want to go. And I know I can take un-paid time off (really as much as I want as long as we're not busy...which WE AREN'T). So if I can get the whole money situation figured out maybe I'll just take a couple weeks off this winter and go to Africa. Anyone want to come with?? Start saving now! (I guess that really means no new shoes, no house...and I was going to say camera, but I need a good camera if I'm going to Africa!)
Last thought then I'm done for the day. The pressure is on to make it a good one. I mean - I can't just write any random thought down right now can I? It's the last thought of the day and while I have many more I could talk about...I need to pick the one that is worthy enough to join the ranks of these other amazing thoughts I've gone on and on about so far (again note the sarcasm). So here it is. Life is good. NO - I don't have a TON of friends and my social life is pretty slow right now. NO - I'm not dating anyone even though I would like to be (thought one). NO - work isn't super exciting right now seeing as I've spent the last 4+ hours NOT working. And NO - I'm not a size 4 with perfect skin, hair & nails like I would like to be. YES my feet and stomach hurt right now. NO - I don't have a ton of money and I can't have EVERYTHING I want to buy. But LIFE IS GOOD. I do have some friends and I'm working on getting more (see last couple of posts). My work allows me time to go to the gym every day and have a life outside of the office. I even get 3 day weekends all summer! I'm healthy. I'm surrounded by people who love me and I know that if ever anything happened I could go to any one of my friends or family and they would help me. I have a friend who will keep playing scrabble with me even though I'm horrible and might sometimes resign when all I have left is an A, E & O and I'm losing by 30+ points and I just want the torture to end. I have the most amazing friend who will listen to all my random thoughts and complaints and gives me advice that I need and will be moving out here to live with me in only 3 1/2 months! I have a Heavenly Father who loves me and is patient with me and even though I don't always come to Him, He's there waiting for me (which, btw, would have led me to thought 11...but I'll spare you all that torture). I have a job - and more importantly, one that I like. I have money coming in which has allowed me to purchase a wonderful car that I love and will soon enable me to have a great place to live with my favorite person in the world. I don't know what the Lord has in store for me (marriage and a family hopefully), but I know He does have a plan. I know that I was led back to UT for some reason and that I was blessed with this job for some purpose. Yes - I wish I knew what the end result would look like, but all I can really do is take one step at a time and as my friend the Winter Warlock sings - put one foot in front of the other and soon you'll be walking out the door. Only the Lord knows where that door leads...but I have faith that it's somewhere good. So no - life isn't perfect. But life is good.
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