Nothing to do...

I'm at work. I'm bored. What's new? Right? 

So to dull my boredom & possibly increase yours, I'm going to write about whatever pops into my head at this time. I don't know where this post will end up. I hope it's somewhere good ;)

I just saw the brightest green car drive past my window just now. And when I say the brightest green car I mean - neon green. And a BRIGHT neon green. I don't think I can actually say it enough times for you to get an accurate picture of what I mean. But man! It was bright green! 

It's really cold in my office. I don't understand why it needs to be so cold that I find it necessary to wear a sweater in mid-August. I know I'm very sensitive to the cold & my body temperature is about 5 degrees lower than most people's. But this is a little ridiculous! 

I think it funny how involved my work people are in my life. They are very concerned with who I'm dating & it always makes me laugh. Well...normally. Sometimes it makes me cry when they judge me for my actions. But I've learned to get over that. I'm no longer concerned about what others think. I'm living life for me now.

It makes me sad when I realize someone who I consider to be a good friend just isn't one anymore. I have a hard time letting go. Maybe that's a good thing? The jury is still out.

I'm grateful for Elder Ballard's talk he gave to my stake on Sunday. He made a lot of really great points. And...I got a date out of it. So thanks Elder Ballard for giving me the courage to say no to only hanging out with a certain boy. 

Seriously why is it so cold in here?

I'm learning I like Death Cab for Cutie a lot more than I thought. And I thought I liked them a lot. But the more I listen to them, the more I like them.

I'm counting down the days until Snow Patrol releases their new song. I'm already obsessed with it. And the music video. Here it is... maybe you too can become as obsessed with it as I am. You probably won't though. I'm a little crazy.

I need to be nicer. I'm too sarcastic. I'm too hard on people. I call people names too much (e.g. "your a dork" "idiot" etc.). I need to stop that. Starting now.

I'm thankful that Jared taught me to be more open about my feelings. I'm not as scared as I once was to tell someone I like them. But I still should work on being more open. 

I'm very excited to have my own place again. But I'm sad that my parents are leaving for 1.5 years in less than 3 weeks! And I wish the place were really MINE - I feel like a guest in my parent's house. And I don't think that will change with them gone. 

I'm hungry. That salad I had for lunch isn't lasting. I'll grab something to eat on my way home.

I got a new trainer at the gym. I really like her. Her name is Heather. She's great. I don't want to cry/pass out/throw up/die after each session. I'm tired. But I feel good.

I don't know if I'll ever understand my heart. I hope I do someday. But for now...I've given up trying to figure out what it wants. I've also given up trying to make it feel differently than it does. I'm just going with the flow. If my heart tells me something, I'll follow it. I may end up very hurt - or hurting someone else. But I can't handle thinking about that at this time in my life.

OMG why is it so cold? My hands are ice!!! Ugh!

I love when people tell me they read my blog. But at the same time, it's a little weird to see someone I know reads it. I never know if they have read my latest post or not. If they have, do they get bored when I tell them what I just blogged about? But if they haven't and I don't tell them, are they going to be hurt that they found out something through a blog post and not through me?

I wish I were more creative. I wish I had a passion for taking pictures, making movies, scrap booking, writing, drawing, painting, etc.

I wish I had a hobby. I need a hobby. But what should it be? What do I like to do? I wish I knew...

Ok...I'm done sitting around pretending to work. It's 5:15. I'm just going to leave. Now...what should I do until 6:15 (when I meet with my trainer)? No idea.

Last thing: I'm excited to see B tonight. I haven't seen him since Sunday and I miss him. That's a good sign, right?